A little note to nobody

11:46 PM

Somehow or rather, i can get very annoyed and angry easily these days. It has got nothing to do with the environment or the things that is happening around me. It is just...me. Within me. Inside me. I want to throw away this unnecessary feeling away. But I couldn't, how much i tried. My emotions are taking control over myself, my mind. This is not what I want. I don't want to be angry. I refuse to. I'm convincing myself that this is not PMS because, i know it isn't. I used to be an angry person back then. Someone who would flare up at every little minor thing it is considered really silly. I used to be hot-tempered. But I managed to move away from being such a person as years goes by. I would usually seem happy, cracking jokes up and laughing away putting all my worries aside. Being angry isn't exactly what anyone would expect me to be. But it's coming to me back again...This.. This cruel feeling. It's planted deep inside me. I want to get rid of it. It's not doing me good. It's not doing anyone good. I don't want to be angry...I don't want to. I hate the feeling that I would suddenly feel right after I throw my temper to anyone. I feel sorry for them. I want to say sorry but I know I would have to repeat myself saying sorry again because this anger within me isn't going away anytime soon. I don't want anyone to think that I'm saying bullshit when I say sorry. I want them to believe. I want them to be assured that it would never happen again. But I know it will. This anger within me is overpowering myself. It'll end even before I could handle it. I want to get rid of this anger fast. Fast. Now. I want to get rid of it now. I don't want my old self back. It just...

sucks.

on a side note,
i love you megat...

because you make me believe.

Crosses and circles,
farah

11:46 PM

11:46 PM